Denise & Ryan : The theme for this week with Denise was family, as Denise told us that she’s sacriiced her children for a place in the Dancing With The Stars : Irelan…oh wait, sorry, sacrificed spending time with her children for a place in the Dancing With The Stars : Ireland final. Sometimes you look at the glint in Ryan’s eyes and you do wonder… Anyway, apparently Denise’s kids have apparently got very involved with their mother’s journey on the show, have taken to calling her partner “Uncle Ryan”, and want to be in the audience every week. Sadly there’s only enough room in the Dancing With The Stars : Ireland audience, where the seating consist of four patio chairs and an old sofa, for so many people, so up til now they’ve been on a rotation with Dayl’s sisters and Aoibhin’s Uncle Pat. Dancing wise we were going to two dances this week, and Denise pulled out Contemporary and Cha Cha, meaning that she’s going into the final having missed out on THREE of the standard “Ballroom 10” (foxtrot, paso and waltz). Not even in Strictly Series 10 etc etc. Of the two, the Contemporary was probably the greater success (indeed, it’s what she chose to reprise in the dance-off), as Denise gave good waft and Ryan produced a choreography (to “Take Me To Church”) with a good deal of dynamism. The cha cha…well harsh judge probably said it best when he said that Ryan had taken his biggest chance of the series in asking Denise to just go out and do a routine full of good strong basic cha cha technique. Because who wants to watch that right?
Aidan & Valeria : So the big story this week was that, despite the rushed introduction of the dance-off, despite his verbal contributions to the show peaking somewhere around monosyllables, and despite most of his dances consisting of him stomping around energetically but awkwardly whilst staring at his partners hands, Aidan is in the final without even hitting the Bottom 2 once. Not even those fakey “…so is this a Bottom 3 or not?” thingies from the first few weeks. Well…that would be the story if Valeria hadn’t turned up for their final VT dressed like this
and now I’m obsessed and can’t talk about anything else. WHAT IS GOING ON THERE? The jockey hat with pom pom? The bacofoil tribute fabric? The massive industrial zip? The tossles that look like an undone bow tie? Those shell-suit tribute cuffs? Whatever the heck it’s doing to her boobs? Anyway, Valeria was dressed like this for a day out in the countryside, as she grasped firmly her role in whatever weird regionalist country vs city divide is going on that Aidan is symbolically representing the former half of. Which I’m going to avoid entirely. Although I did like when she passive-aggressively called Dublin dirty. Dancewise Aidan got Jive and Viennese Waltz, the former of which was bordering on Michael Vaughan levels of off-time hoofing, and the latter of which relied on speeed substantially over substance, but just about held together enough for Harsh Judge to tacitly admit he was probably going to end up in the final. But can he win? With two potentially interchangeable attractive blondes represening PURITY OF DAHNCE up against him, I wouldn’t bet against it.
Dayl & Ksenia : Yes, because Dayl will not be taking part in the Dancing With The Stars : Ireland, the brief blip in his vote turning out to be something a little more permanent. Who knows what it was – maybe the public (other than co-host Nicky Byrne) weren’t ready for a boybander doing a very boybandy rumba to a minor Westlife song complete with CHIFFON WAFTING – the very highest tier of wafting. (There was an Irish theme to all of the first round music picks this week, it being St Patrick’s weekend, but really the full expression of Irish Week was found in our time filler routines : Riverdance and a truly truly bizarre pro dance to Enya featuring Curtis Pritchard dressed up as a weird crow/strait jacket monster that I’m still getting over). Maybe it’s because his VT was pretty bland, focusing on his struggle in a fairly bland way without anything about his personality coming out. Maybe it’s because he
fell on his bum (lol) in his quickstep. Maybe it’s that that the quickstep was really weirdly choreographed, complete with lots of weird pauses for vamping that didn’t really come off. Maybe it’s because, as Harsh Judge said, that he lacked the acting chops of an Aoibhin or a Denise to put that extra little bit of sell on his routines to put him over the edge. Whatever the reason, Dayl this week went from a seemingly sure-fire finalist to someone who only finished marginally ahead of where Nicky Byrne landed on Strictly in the boyband member stakes.
Aoibhin & Vitali : If there was a theme with Aoibhin this week it was abrupt finishes, as the limitations to the show having all its music on tape showed itself this week, as both Aoibhin’s first (Contemporary to “Nothing Compares 2 U”) and second (Charleston to “Do Your Thing”) performances were cut off abruptly because they didn’t have the benefit of a Davearch orchestration to help bring them to a more gentle halt. God knows Aoibhin did her best to try and sell the end-poses anyway
have you ever seen anything more Mills & Boon in your LIFE?) but it lent her most triumphant week yet – topping the leaderboard and sailing into the final, an odd air of anti-climax. Don’t get me wrong, of all the contestants remaining I’m still Team Aoibhin though, and she demonstrated for me exactly why this week when she decided to announce out of nowhere that she’s been thinking about the coastguard all week. Don’t get me wrong, I know this is probably due to events in Ireland that I’m not familiar with (the British having had their own…news to distract them this week) but on the face of it it’s so appealingly silly that I don’t really want to look into it any deeper. Also, yes, Vitali ripped his shirt open again, I am not immune.