Strictly Come Dancing 13 – Week 7 Results Summary

It’s Remembrance Weekend (you can tell from how there are posts at Digital Spy chiding Claudia for wearing the leaf on her poppy at the wrong angle no I am not making this up) and we all know what that means right? The pros doing a jitterbug in full uniform. The difference this year? Joanne gets to sing along with the band, and also Anton gets shoved into an office at the side to shuffle files and answer the phone. I’ve never really believed in Poor Anton until now but… (We also get the usual “couples go and collect money and gently party with veterans” sequence. It seems like a lower turnout that usual this year, although we do hear Natalie and Joanne talk about their families involvement with the Second World War. Less so Giovanni)

Our special guest singer this week is Seal but it’s not Kiss From A Rose, so I’m not going to dignify this segment by recapping it. Unless you’re really into Giovanni with his top off, let me know in the comments.

Len’s Glans is, sadly, slowly sliding back to old ways as whilst we cover in technical detail Kellie’s double reverse heel turns and Jay’s one solitary gancho, we also have to suffer slow-motion of Darcey jumping up and down yelling “TEN!” and Bruno flailing around at Jeremy’s cowboy tango COZ IT WAS SO FUNNY HA HA I NEARLY DIED etc. We do however get the pleasure of watching Darcey say that Peter and Janette were perfectly in sync over a clip of them…not so much being perfectly in sync.

Our Bottom 2? After Helen suffers one of the most protracted breakdowns ever seen during the wait for the red light. Somehow, despite everything against her, Jamelia manages to haul herself clear of the danger zone meaning we have three bottom virgins facing the drop. Yes, that’s right, the bloom is off Kevin Clifton’s perfect game, as he and Kellie are our mid-series SHOCK BOTTOM TWO’ers. Fortunately for them, they’re up against Carol & Pasha, unsurprisingly, and equally unsurprisingly see them off fairly handily. Happily though, Carol’s routine is one of those slow release ones that don’t make sense in the context of the main show but which do in fact work perfectly as a Goodbye Dance. For Man! Pasha has made Carol feel like a woman. He tells her that she is his favourite Strictly experience amongst them all. Which is such a lie, but whatever, IT’S PASHA.

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37 thoughts on “Strictly Come Dancing 13 – Week 7 Results Summary

  1. Elaine

    Never mind the poppy, Claudia has come as an old fashioned cyberman! (I am very old) Is she really a zygon? Have always known Tess was an Auton…(or do I mean Anton?).

    Reply
  2. Elaine

    Sorry, very confused….and hiding from digital spy. Godawful results show as per. Seal has run out of divorce money from Heidi, otherwise he would never perform in this pile of pants. The best bit was Helen’s emotional collapse…how does she function in the real world?

    Reply
  3. Marcela

    As you asked, I am very much into Giovanni with his top open, please, please, please, just one little screen grab, many many thanks, God bless you, Monkseal!

    Reply
      1. Minxy

        And since the EMRiaRW stopped trying to turn him into Vinthent 2.0!
        He is so much better when allowed to be himself

  4. Minxy

    I have no idea what Seal sang … I couldn’t hear him. The sound level went way down to a level my ears can’t pick up and my TV was already on loud. (Have a similar problem with Dr Who – no matter what level of volume TV is on I have to put the subtitles on to catch half the speech)

    The dancing was good tho

    Reply
  5. Gerry

    I’m almost amazed that Craig actually knows what a gancho is — maybe he could tell Len that it’s not the same as a gaucho and while he’s at it he could inform the rest of the “Judges” that a milonga is not the same as a seedy bar or bordello!

    Reply
    1. Minxy

      I had to laugh at Craig pontificating at that.
      What was it he said to Len after Helen’s dance?
      There are lots of different steps to a dance. No requirement to use them all

      I wish someone had said those words back to him

      I liked that it was a different pace and style to the usual.

      But, for me, Jay performed the steps he was given, but didn’t emote the dance. So I was meh. Aliona emoted. Damn, if Jay could have matched her then he WOULD have topped the board.

      Helen and Anita emoted their dances so much better (without gurning or overacting) even tho they technically didn’t perform as well. I enjoyed theirs more

      Reply
    2. Huriye

      Bring back Strictly Dance Fever, where we first saw the Milonga, and Flavia & Vincent for that matter in the sister show. ❤

      Reply
    3. monkseal Post author

      Looking at Craig’s ganchos I’m not sure he should be touting himself as an expert, not even compared to Len.

      Reply
  6. Minxy

    Last week I did actually re watch the show after reading the recap – and enjoyed it so much more!
    I have already watched this week’s again. And again enjoyed it so much more
    Now having seen Len’s glans and Bruno NOT watching Jeremy I am actually very pissed off.
    All the complaints about Jeremy’s Tango are annoying me
    He actually did do a tango when you look past the theming – and did it so much better than some of the others we have seen!
    Complaints about gapping … yes there was some but, surprisingly, most of it was tight together. Go check. Same with the footwork and body placement

    Yes it was a camp routine. What the hell else could be done to that song?
    It wasn’t perfect by any means But it was a proper tango (in strictly terms), properly danced and well worth a second look – paying attention to the dancing not the accessorising and without the filter of preconceptions clouding vision.

    Reply
  7. BeyonceCastle

    Perfect summing up Chris. But why was Claudia wearing a bin bag? and if Georgia is intending to dance to the whole of Chicago that’s going to be an awfully long Charleston.

    Reply
    1. Gerry

      Surely Claudia wasn’t wearing a bin bag? I thought that, in keeping with the Remembrance Day theme, she had mistakenly recycled barrage balloon fabric instead of parachute fabric.

      Reply
      1. Gerry

        Oh yeah! She, Zoe and Monkseal are my main Strictly sources of enjoyment now that Artem has well and truly defected to the good ole US of A, and John from Wales is no longer active

    2. Christel

      It was like a weird binbag/tinfoil concoction…..

      Also happy that other’s noticed Len’s Glans showing just not together PDuh was with his partner….wayyy overscored.

      Reply
  8. Sue Howarth

    Extremely proud of my correct prediction. I think Jamelia will leave next week and Jeremy the week after. I will wait for the dance/song list to come out to guess who they will dance against
    I think Kellie will be seeing a lot of dance off’s, there is something unlikable about her, which is sad as she was the cleb I was most excited about.

    Reply
    1. catherinehirst

      Agree re: Jamelia but not sure re: Jeremy. The crowd (public?) bloody love him. I could see Katie or even Helen going out before him (I hope not Helen; I like her and think she’s got way more to give going forward. Katie, I’m not that fussed, think we’ve probably seen the best of her already).

      Reply
      1. MorticiaA

        I am wondering if his dance, in whatever form it takes, at Blackpool will be considered a triumph by the judges, they’ll strategically overmark him, he’ll lose his cachet as the comedy contestant, and out he’ll go. That was how Judy was flushed last year. After Kelllleeee in this week’s dance off, and whichever better dancer will survive against Jamelia next week, I think Jezza’s strictly gag, cough, gag “jurnee” will come to a natural close. And I say that with affection…

    2. monkseal Post author

      I still think they’re going to have to be careful or Jeremy’s going to breeze through Blackpool and start causing problems. All the OTT routines and “HE’LL DO MYSTERIOUS GIRL IN DA FINAL” is on the verge of creating a monster. In the nicest possible way.

      Reply
  9. Huriye

    Another one for Giovanni topless. Very impressed with his rapid turns, thank Gawd they livened up Seal’s boring performance.

    Aw, bless lovely Pasha. What a gent he has been with Carol. He probably never expected to last so many weeks, but they’re still way more likeable as a couple than Kellie & Kevin. I was not surprised to see them in the Bottom 2, and was annoyed how the Judges made it soooo clear they’d decided the outcome before the Dance Off. What if KK had fallen flat on their faces?
    And Oh, the lies re “I get to Dance with Kevin again”, then in the closing credits the truth comes out, ” it was horrible!”. Get used to it baby! 😛

    Reply
    1. monkseal Post author

      If they’d fallen Craig, Darcey and Bruno all would have saved Kellie and then Len would have had an eppie about it. That’s normally how these things go.

      Reply
  10. Kiki

    So pleased I resisted the spoiler- seeing poor Helen and not knowing if her terror was going to come true was the best part of the show.
    And Aljaz’s comment to Claudia – “no particular order? I don’t like that order!”

    Reply
  11. Mared

    I think Kellie and Kevin’s dance would have been better if it was clear they were acting out an amicable divorce by walking in separate directions in the end. Something a bit Penny Serenade but allowing that sometimes people are better apart. I was expecting that and got disappointed when it didn’t happen.

    Reply

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