Hey kids, what’s better than ONE Barry Manilow performance? That’s right! NO BARRY MANILOW PERFORMANCES! Unfortunately we’ve got two of them this evening, the first being a fairly standard talk-through of Copacabana complete with the most awkward audience interaction I’ve ever seen, and the second being him DUETTING WITH THE CORPSE OF LOUIS ARMSTRONG sort of. I don’t think they’re singing the same song a lot of the time. You’d think this would be a problem with a duet, but Barry ploughs on regardless bless him. Also in LIVE PERFORMANCE news there’s a pro cops & robbers routine featuring Robin and Anya. The former is acknowledged, the latter is not. That is…not the way around I would have it be, but ok.
Len’s Glans features Darcey twerking and Jake twerking and a lot of talk about twerking that just makes me glad that Bruce isn’t still here because Lord knows he would have tried to cut in on the action and it would have been absolutely mortifying. This week also sees the return, after its Blackpool break, of THAT’S CLAUDIA!, this time with Dave Myers and Mary Berry. Based on past precedent this means that Mary Berry is secretly the mother of either Sunetra Sarker or Steve Backshall or maybe even both, as they are this evening’s entirely predictable bottom 2. And speaking of predictable, Steve goes home, by a vote of 3 to 1, with Darcey dissenting because she likes his GUNZ. No really. That was her reasoning. Amazing. He gives a lengthy speech where he reminisces about his favourite dances from his fellow contestants, most of which happened.
The most important thing though, is that Jake announces that next week he’s going to be doing an Argentine Tango to Zorba The Greek. With plate-smashing. Racist Dress-Up Week’s going to be fun isn’t it? Hope someone’s got a bone through their nose to represent the country of Africa.