Strictly Come Dancing 12 – Week 4 Performance Summary

So theoretically, given that most of the contestants were at least a little flat, this week’s show should have been a lot less fun than usual, but for some reason I loved it! Maybe it was just in comparison with last week, with its poor pacing and overwhelming theming and general…Donnyness, but all of the couples brought something interesting to the table this week, even if it was just their famous children.

With such a lot of stuff going on, it was probably the front-runners that suffered the most. All of the putative final four danced well, but all of their dances were missing something. Frankie’s cha cha lacked a little personality, Caroline’s quickstep lacked an ability to handle her great big oversized fairground props with anything like aplomb, Jake’s jive lacked a little coherence and control, and Pixie’s rumba lacked…well rumba, says Len. It did feel a bit like her running through her best ballet moves (again) but she had a great big production number of a crying fit at the end so…at least somebody connected with it. Also Trent met Pixie’s family and they were all huddled drunk in one corner of her kitchen and it was great.

In the chasing pack of men, Simon of course gets his mandated Post Shock Bottom 2 Comeback Dance with a Pearly King themed Charleston, right down to Len saying that he’ll PICKUW HIS WAWNUTS if he finds himself in trouble again. I don’t actually have a spreadsheet showing if Len has ever actually had to pickuw his wawnuts, but I doubt it. Thom does a foxtrot in one of the worst outfits I’ve ever seen on this show (is it me, or are the men actually dressed worse than the women this year?) but the iceberg that is his personality is slowly starting to show cracks and also Iveta is taught to play rugby and I think starts to bite people and has to then be committed? It was fun whatever happened. Mark is insanely overscored for a quickstep that involves him running around with Karen limply holding on to him, but his Nanny Pat turns up dressed in a giant Phantom Of The Opera doily, so I can’t get too mad. Only Steve is really off the pace, as he still can’t quite wrap his muscles around Party Latin. Worse though, someone’s done the world’s worst wax job on his chest. Seriously, it looks like it’s been done with a butter knife.

The women in the middle? Neither of them dance their Party Latins well, but both of them do it with such exuberance I’m not sure it matters. Sunetra’s salsa to “Turn The Beat Around” gets so frantic that Brendan’s trousers give up the ghost entirely and Alison’s samba’ing impersonation of Beyonce is ALL BOOBS and nothing else but it still kind of works. On…erm…an emotional level.

It’s at the back of the pack though where the actual magic and madness happens. Judy Murray fulfils what we all wanted her here for (to embarrass her children via her sexuality) but then exceeds all our requirements by actually…dancing…not…the worst? Her complete lack of motility sort of weirdly suits the tango and Anton flinging her around like he’s expecting a dog to chase after her and catch her in his mouth even more so. Tim and Natalie do their best to live up to the very concept of a paso doble to “Simply The Best” by Tina Turner and I think Natalie gets closer but I’m laughing too much to care. And finally, maybe, Joanne Clifton learns a lesson about what happens when you give deliberately campy bad-taste “bad choreography” to a guy who can’t dance. Carnage. Utter carnage.


25 thoughts on “Strictly Come Dancing 12 – Week 4 Performance Summary

  1. Martin

    Spot on review – for me only Thom seemed to actually nail his dance this week. I hope beyond hope that the British public do Scott a favour and let him be in the bottom two where the judges put him out of his misery and let him sit in his radio studio, watching the other duos spit water over each other… 🙂

  2. Left Feet

    Yes I agree with most of that, it was an OK show but needed a great dance from one of the top four. Poor Scott it takes a lot for Len and Bruno to move from their turn up scores of five but that dance did it. I feel for the guy but he can’t dance and deep down I am not sure he is enjoying it at all.
    Will one of the middle guys make the final? Simon is the most talented but has had an early trip to the dance off. Steve and Mark are not really talented enough and that leaves Thom who really is very dull (even for a rugby player except Austin of course) but has improved quite a bit.

    1. monkseal Post author

      I think Thom or Steve could make it if their public vote is massive, but Jake seems the type to syphon off some of their fan-bases and I can’t see them being anywhere than bottom of any semi-final leaderboard. Simon could also make it, but it’d be on the back of the judges. I do think they very easily could start giving him really high scores soon based on their comments. Mark hasn’t got a cat in hell’s chance based on the last month.

      1. Left Feet

        Yes Jake could take some of their vote, Thom and Steve probably have similar fanbases who like a Strictly Hunk with no previous training going on a journey to somewhere, but Jake is probably taking some of that vote as well
        Simon I think has some dance talent but is not popular for whatever reason. He was better this week, and is trying hard to be less surly.

  3. Chris

    LOL at Frankie and Thom’s VTs being more about their partners than them.

    Len going full Shylock when the audience booed him was weird – ‘If you prick us, do we not bleed?’ – does this mean he’s going to be publicly humiliated, lose all his money and become a social pariah by the end of this series?

    1. monkseal Post author

      Can you really blame them?

      (Also I can’t deal with them actually scripting Len’s rants back at the audience it’s so tragic)

  4. Gusty Gussett

    Watching Thaam’s dance, I could feel a journey coming on. He and Caroline are my favourites now (although I accept that Jake is the best of the male celebs).

    Also, I couldn’t help noticing that Dolly from Widows was in the audience and she wasn’t seated in the front row. Sacrilege!

    Kristina was fabulous in that charleston. Simon was good, but she just stole the show.

    Judy being thrown about by Anton was amazing. I think she would win a dance-off against Tim or Scott. The mid-tabler I’m worried about this week is Sunetra. Her AS was my favourite dance of the series so far, but I think it was possibly a one-off.

    Have to say, I think the band and singers have been very good this series. And who would have thought that Total Eclipse of the Heart would be on primetime Saturday night TV twice in one evening?

  5. kikishua

    Thom was so stiff the first couple of dances and so much more relaxed this week and last – barely seemed like the same person. Iveta is amazing in the rehearsal/VT stuff. Love her big time this year.

    I adore Scott but simultaneously feel so sorry for him and can barely bring myself to watch him suffering. I wonder if he would have been a bit better with someone more experienced in the SCD ways than Joanne (a bit, mind – not sure there’s much room for more than that).

    Simon hasn’t recovered my good opinion yet, after the sulks of last week.

    This was obviously the week the judges decided to start being critical all round (well almost) – at last!

  6. Ferny

    I didn’t think it would happen after the first couple of weeks but…Thom and Iveta are now my favourites and they just make me laugh without needing to even doing anything. Thom can actually do ‘Broadway’ type acting pretty damn well. He is such a bot but he is getting better.

    I love Judy acting, and I love her with Anton. But she won’t ever be ‘good’ sadly.

    I’ve always ‘got’ the comedy contestants, even if I didn’t like them, but I just don’t understand Scott. He seems really touchy and a bit moody. He’s not go the character for comedy, I haven’t found anything about him funny, and shoehorning him into comedy makes me cringe. He looked so much like he was TRYING to be bad this week that I’m just confused as to whether he is trying to do ‘comedy bad’ or not?! My guess is he’s getting a lot more votes than the producers thought he would get/want him to get…

    I like everyone else this year so it’s going to get tricky in a couple of weeks 😦

    1. Jan

      I’m confused by that about Scott, too. I just can’t tell how serious he’s being about wanting to do well or even wanting to stay in at all. For all my online sniping, I don’t actually want to be laughing at someone failing when they’re trying really hard or at reactions borne of genuine hurt, so the whole thing just makes me uncomfortable and I wander off for a toilet break when he’s on.

  7. Huriye

    Do you think Greg James really was the original booking, but the Producers decided that the ‘Hunk’ category was already full up with Thom/Steve/Mark, so Scott got the call instead? He must be unique in the entire world of Radio DJs, in being without one rhythmical, musical bone in his body….weird that.
    JFG is permanently weird. So they’re suited in that respect.

    I loved the Twitter complainer that KFG went to CLEETHORPES and NOT Grimsby, and demanding to know WHY? Indeed!
    I wish he’d devote a bit of time to giving Choreography lessons to the 2 women in his life, as both his Fiance & Sister are clueless. Has Karen Hauer ever produced a memorable routine? I’d be sad if Aliona was given the flick in favour of either of those 2 staying on in the Pro ranks.

    Darcey refusing to DAHNCE in the intro is really annoying me. Put a bit of effort into it! Lord knows you’re not there for your pearls of wisdom! I feel the Judging Panel is long overdue a major shake-up. Though a highlight last night was the Darcey Heckler, whom I thought she dealt with very professionally. Politicians and Comedians, take note.

    The 2 Dances I enjoyed the most last night were Trent & Pixie’s Rumba. I loved the beautiful softness, the romance, and it moved me.
    Also Thom & Iveta’s Fox Trot was adorably charming. That cap and his Flower Seller’s outfit were gorgeous! Monkseal, your Fashion tastes need tweaking, really they do.
    His facial expressions were so joyful, and he’s clearly found a love of Dance. If those 2 aren’t shagging soon I’ll be very surprised. And what a gent to present a bloom to Claude on one knee. Loved her comment: “See you at the Wrap Party!” 😀

    Thought Pasha & Caroline’s Quickstep was overpraised and overrated. I like their dancing alot, but you can’t compare that QS with Chelsea’s. Though the endless props didn’t help! REFUSE next time Pasha!

    1. Penny

      Karen’s first routine for Dave Hairy Biker was definitely memorable.

      But I’m with you on Darcey. If Len can dance and “sing” then so can you Darcey.

    2. pootle

      The judging pattern seems rigidly stuck in a (x-1)xxx pattern, unless they go crazy and make it (x-2)xxx when Bad Craigy’s being Super Meeen, or (x-1)x(x-1)x when Len gets the random hump about lifting. Darcey serves no identifiable purpose.

    3. monkseal Post author

      Am fairly sure that Greg has said that he pulled out at the last minute. I doubt this show could ever decide it had too many hunks.

  8. Marie

    I’m not surprised Brendan’s trousers split. It looked like wardrobe either gave him the wrong clothes or were working off measurements that were a few years old.

    1. Pops

      I was at my parents’ house last night and my mum and I both remarked on how unflattering Brendan’s shirt was. (My dad didn’t have any opinion on the wardrobe, but he did say Scott was “lucky to get into double figures, the stompy pillock.” Harsh, but when even Len can’t muster a ‘well, you came out and gave it a go’ and Darcy’s advice is essentially ‘have you ever actually seen anyone dance?’…)

      I was a bit disappointed with Jake, partly because I thought he looked really promising on ITT, and partly because Scott Maslen did my favourite ever male jive, and I quite liked the idea of the Branning brothers being the secret jive kings of Albert Square. I think Jake’s needed more kicks and flicks, and less Elvis – and of course Natalie jiving with more aggression than most people bring to a paso.

  9. Neio

    I’m with the others who say to get rid of the bloody props (or at least tone them down a lot). Caroline’s a good dancer, but her and Pasha’s dance was made really stilted by having to mess around with hoopla rings and teddy bears, never mind having to avoid the massive props left on the floor (like that stupid bucket and spade Abbey and Aljaz had on the dancefloor last year in Blackpool)..

    I loved Thom and Iveta – he’s coming along in leaps and bounds and really learning to perform.

    It’s getting very uncomfortable to watch Scott. He seems to over-sensitive for the role he’s being forced into by the show. He hasn’t been well-served by the choreography either.

    1. monkseal Post author

      I really like the idea of Joanne winning World Championships, in the middle of a crowd of couples looking very Strictly Ballroom, dressed as a mermaid doing the crab.


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