Strictly Pro Poll 2014 – The Results

Coming thicker and faster than EVER BEFORE!

38 (33). Jared Murillo – 2.72 (2.95)

Most Common Score :Β 1
Best Finish : Tina O’Brien – 11th place

Lowest One-Series Wonder
Lowest Former Pro
Lowest Male Pro
Fewest 10s
Fewest 9s
Most 3s
Most 2s
Most 1s

Poor Jared. After several years benefiting from everyone’s murkily negative opinions of the pros from the show’s Jurassic Period, you’ve finally taken the plunge and named him as the worst pro ever to darken Strictly’s glittery doors. I post the above picture of him looking a bit sad, not as trying to exhort you to change your minds, but to show you that he has at least sorted his hair out now. Mostly. I mean he looks a bit Amish, but then that is better than going on Strictly radiating Mormonism out of every pore. Maybe all he needed was a few more years to mature.

37 (34). Kylie Jones – 2.96 (2.51)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Jason Wood – 8th place

Most Forgotten Pro
Lowest Female Pro
Fewest 10s
Fewest 9s
Fewest 6s

A strong showing for Kylie this year, as a increase of almost half a point amongst the opinions of the handful of people who remember lifts her slowly but elegantly off the very bottom of the annual Pro Poll, caked in the mud of three straight years as the holder of the Strictly Wooden Spoon. She’ll always be the First Boot ever of Strictly but now she can proudly say that she is only second-last in your hearts.

36 (30). John Byrnes – 3.12 (3.14)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Claire Sweeney – 5th place

Fewest 10s
Fewest 6s
Fewest 5s

In the wake of James Jordan appearing on Celebrity Big Brother (more of which when we get to his elimination in…however many days you think that’s going to take) and claiming to be the “Brad Pitt of the dance world” (ie ageing via a series of increasingly bizarre hairdos and chiefly known these days for who he’s married to) it’s a germane time to look back on a guy who introduced himself as the “Robbie Williams of the dance world”. John has of course dipped out of the public eye so far that it’s impossible to tell how true that assessment still is, so let’s just presume he’s someone slowly bloating out in a field muttering to himself about aliens anyway.

35 (29). Izabela Hanna – 3.32 (3.29)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Dennis Taylor – 8th place

Fewest 9s

The mystery continues.

34 (27). Paul Killick – 3.36 (3.6)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Verona Josephs – 6th place

As Strictly cycles through another bad boy, depositing him in the garbage (aka Channel 5) let’s all remember the original Strictly Bad Boy : Paul “Killer” Killick. It’s kind of hard to remember why he WAS a Bad Boy, but let’s face it, it was probably just because he looks like a wrong’un. For two series he rained supreme as the moustache-twirling villain of the dressing room, before Brendan just proved…better at it, intangibly, and he got immediately forgotten. It’s nice to see that he and Carol have remained such good friends though – as have Carol and wine.

33 (31). Hayley Holt! – 3.39 (3.05)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Mark Foster – 11th place

Fewest 9s

So let’s catch up on the last year in the Famewhoring Adventures of Hayley Holt! Having left the Morning Crew of her radio station, Hayley Holt! moved on to covering the Sochi Winter Olympics decked in fabulous furs, and now appears to be trying to make a name for herself as a left-wing political commentator. And that was the last year in the New Zealand Famewhoring Adventures Of Hayley Holt!

32 (28). Andrew Cuerden – 3.44 (3.33)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Jaye Jacobs – 11th place

Fewest 9s
Fewest 8s

This year I can give you EXCLUSIVE (ish) pictures from inside Strictly Erotica, the event that will define both Andrew and his dance partner Hanna H for all Strictly time. If you’re wondering, Andrew is the arse on the right.

31 (32). Hazel Newberry – 3.64 (3.05)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Quentin Wilson – 10th place

Fewest 7s

There’s Hazel Newberry – one of Britain’s most garlanded ballroom dancers who lasted for one week on Strictly, and produced the worst dance the show’s ever seen. There’s Anton du Beke who jives like his legs are made of Swiss Roll, who has lasted for 11 series now, and regularly gets paired with the most famous woman in the cast. Think on.

30 (26). Hanna Haarala – 3.95 (3.74)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Will Thorp – 7th place

Fewest 9s

Another exclusive picture from the world of Strictly Erotica there. Hanna is on the far right of the picture. Right next to Nancy Dell’Olio. In skin-tight wipe-clean leatherette. God how I wish I’d been there.

29 (24). Hanna Karttunen – 4.2 (4.31)

Most Common Score : Don’t Know
Best Finish : Christopher Parker – Runner-Up

Just as Kylie Jones relinquishes her post at the bottom of the pro poll, so another era passes, as Hanna K must give up her crown as the perennially most missed One Series Wonder. No longer does she represent a possibly proud, bright, long and storied history cut short in its prime. Now she’s just another ex-pro. Still, by the looks of this picture she now lives a life of Scandi fashion show glamour, so don’t feel too sorry for her. She still made it further in the competition with her duffer than Anton ever has.

28. Janette Manrara – 4.32

Most Common Score : 4
Best Finish : Julien MacDonald – 13th place

Most 4s
Lowest Current Pro

Poor Janette. To see her go from one of the SYTYCD contestants who I most wanted to win (Kamilah Barrett, Travis Wall, Danny Tidwell, Chelsie Hightower, Janette Manrara, Jakob Carr, Lauren Froderman, Melanie Moore, Cole Horibe, Jasmine Harper, Zack Everhart Jr) to the least popular of the current pro line-up is a heartbreaker. But then again Chelsie was a crap pro on Dancing With The Stars as well so I don’t feel too guilty about it. That said, I’m not sure any one of the female pros really could have done anything with Julien that would have made compelling television, unless maybe Natalie folded up into a neat little bundle and played basketball with him as someone whistled the Harlem Globetrotters theme tune. Hopefully this year she will shine and climb a little, and make my old love feel a little more justified.

27 (23). Anton du Beke – 4.85 (4.78)

Most Common Score : 6
Best Finish : Lesley Garrett – 3rd Place

Turns out that Anton’s “mic pack” was only worth a measly extra 0.07 points on his scores. Although given that Fiona was an Avon Lad…sorry “Bond Girl” maybe that score increase is somewhat appropriate.

26 (18). James Jordan – 4.98 (5.51)

Most Common Score : 4
Best Finish : Denise Van Outen – Runner-Up

Biggest Faller – Places
Biggest Faller – Scores
Most 4s

Not an entirely unpredictable result here, as James’ last stint on Strictly proved to be pretty forgettable, getting the battered plum on the Tree Of Flowering Womanhood that was Strictly’s YEAR OF THE LADY. But what really sent him spiralling down the table presumably was the trail of not terribly interesting carnage he’s left in his wake following his firing. And even then most of the voting was done before his stint at the head of one of Big Brother’s perennially hated Cool Kid Cliques. To my mind the real damage comes from how he has repeatedly promised to SPILL STRICTLY’S DIRTIEST SECRETS but has focused on complaining that he gets paid less than Bruno Tonioli and that the VT editing is biased, rather than, say spilling all about how Penny Lancaster and Arlene Phillips once had a drunken slap-fight when Arlene made an inappropriate pass at Rod Stewart, or that time he found Artem bumming Pasha senseless over a wheelie-bin round the back of Birmingham NIA on tour. You know, things of that ilk. Not specifically that. Necessarily. Nothing worse than a gossip-tease.

25 (22). Brian Fortuna – 5 (5.12)

Most Common Score : 5
Best Finish : Ali Bastian – 3rd place

Most 5s

Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand vaguely overbearing VTs.

24 (25). Karen Hauer – 5.04 (4.28)

Most Common Score : 7
Best Finish : Nicky Bryne – 6th place

Karen is one of this year’s highest climbers, at least in terms of scores as she climbs almost an entire point from her slightly inauspicious debut year on the poll. Maybe this was a little to do with her partnership with Dave showing a funnier, more manic, more playful side to her, maybe it’s because she dropped that bizarre sub-Aliona “I’M GOING TO (occasionally) BREAK ALL OF THE RULES (a bit)” persona she came in with, and maybe it’s mostly because we all met her husband-to-be and he was adorable. Whatever the reason, it’s enough that they’ve challenged her with the diciest prospect of this year’s Hunks Du Jour so let’s see how she does…

23 (20). Nicole Cutler – 5.17 (5.31)

Most Common Score : 5
Best Finish : John Barnes – 7th place

I’ve always thought that Matthew and Nicole Cutler had one of the most bizarrely tempestuous Strictly stories in the history of the show, but the fact that they’re both such benignly agreeable people meant that nobody really reacted. Think about it. One series she turns up and he does, then the next series he turns up and she doesn’t, then the next series they’re both there and do several spinny spinny showdances together, then the next series they’re divorced and she’s suddenly got MASSIVE NEW TITS, then the next series she’s gone. On paper it sounds like the sort of controversial tumult that today would somehow have one Kristina Rihanoff slowly rotating (upside down in her knickers) in the centre. But with the Cutlers? A collective shrug. Also this year Nicole came very very close to having her most common score be “Don’t Know”. The old ways, they are fading faster every day.

22 (17). Robin Windsor – 5.96 (5.76)

Most Common Score : 6
Best Finish : Lisa Riley – 5th place

Every year it gets a little bit funnier to remember the days when Strictly was telling us to LOCK UP OUR DAUGHTERS BECAUSE ROBIN WINDSOR WAS ON THE WAY. This year, Robin got a celebrity boyfriend and choreographed a jive (/”jive”) to “Making Your Mind Up” by Bucks Fizz. The show may struggle to get its camp contestants to fit into the nice neat little boxes they have assigned to them, but lord knows you can always rely on Robin Windsor so slide right in. Sadly Robin will be sitting this series out, with a hurty back, so we are to have our first series without a gay pro since Series 1. Sad times for such a glittery show.

21. Anya Garnis – 6.07

Most Common Score : 6
Best Finish : Patrick Robinson – 5th place

Highest One-Series Wonder

And so it is that it is Anya Garnis picks up the torch passed by Hanna Karttunen, and ascends to the throne of pro most cut down in their very brief prime. Unless she comes back following what looks to possibly be a female pro stampede to the exit at the end of the series (Ola? Aliona? Janette? Natalie? WHO WILL LEAVE) we only got one glorious season of Anya Garnis with her eyes randomly bugged out at all time, eternally not quite sure which camera to look it. On the one hand it takes some going to be outshone by the sparkling personality of Patrick Robinson. On the other hand who needs a personality off the floor when you shine so brightly on it? I’ll miss you Anya Garnis. I hope you enjoy labouring in Jason Gilkinson’s Nightmarish Choreographical Salt Mine.

As we hit the Top 20 it’s as good a time as any to remind you of your predictions from last year’s Pro Poll, and open up a new can :

Aljaz – 11th to 15th place
Anya – 11th to 15th place
Kevin – 16th to 20th place
Janette – 21st to 25th place

20 (21). Aliona Vilani – 6.09 (5.28)

Most Common Score : 6
Best Finish : Harry Judd – Winner

Least Forgotten Pro
Lowest Winner

Yes, Kylie is no longer the worst pro ever, Hanna K is no longer the greatest One Series Wonder, and after three Pro Polls anchored to the number 21 slot with a death grip strong than that of Bruce Forsythe on life itself, Aliona Vilani finally put the motors on and pulled herself into the Top 20 for the very first time. Now a shift of one whole place might not seem like a lot, but bear in mind that if she replicates this increase in score next time she’d be all the way up at 14th. And given that by the looks of it this series is going to see Aliona entrenched ever deeper in her role as Strictly’s pissy supply teacher (NO BACKCHAT WALLACE, NOW BE QUIET AND DO YOUR FRENCH GRAMMAR IN COMPLETE SILENCE WHILST I FINISH OFF THIS SCOTCH!) I wouldn’t bet against it.

19 (16). Camilla Dallerup – 6.23 (5.93)

Most Common Score : 7
Best Finish : Tom Chambers – Winner

Most 6s

Happy 40th girl! (I know – the fact that Brendan once dated a woman older than him really surprised me as well, and shook up my view of his personality for the bett…oh wait he’s probably just lying about his own age never mind)

18 (15). Kristina Rihanoff – 6.33 (6.34)

Most Common Score : 7
Best Finish : Jason Donovan – 3rd place

So based on the scores given, last series, and Kristina’s partnership with Ben Cohen, didn’t change your mind about her one bit. It’s almost as though we’d seen it before – the legs never not being in the air, the saucy choreography, the DEF CON 1 meltdown directed at the judges when they were eliminated, the never-changing Marilyn hair and clown make-up, the post show rumours that I’m gliding over smoothly oh look how smoothly I am gliding over them… Kristina does feel a bit like a pro in stasis at this point, although given that she’s now been given a young attractive male celeb with NATURAL RHYTHM (*drink*) for the first time ever, maybe this time next year we’ll be talking about that whole other side of Kristina we didn’t expect to see. Maybe.

17 (11). Ola Jordan – 6.63 (6.8)

Most Common Score : 7
Best Finish : Chris Hollins – Winner

Most 7s

It’s a case of guilt by association here for Ola as whilst she’s dropped two fewer places than him, and her score has decreased by one third of his drop, surely there’s little doubt that if James had taken his sacking a little bit more smoothly, then she herself wouldn’t have taken this tumble? She had a likeable enough year with Ashley, producing some decent choreography and buying herself a lot of sympathy with both the fact that she got stuck in the 35 Zone and also got the shittiest draw with the forced props and staging planted on the pros last series (although nothing will ever quite measure up to Pendledrama being forced to recreate the closing scenes of ET in her Wembley paso doble that one time). Hopefully at some time over the next series Ola and James both find the Let It Go button and move on with dignity. If they’re looking for it, they can ask Erin – she accidentally sat on it at the start of Series 7 and was never the same again.

16 (13). Karen Hardy – 6.69 (6.77)

Most Common Score : 8
Best Finish : When She Won With Ramps

Always that picture. Always.

15. Kevin Clifton – 6.79

Most Common Score : 8
Best Finish : Susanna Reid – Runner-Up

A decent start here for Kevin, although I’m not sure what would have happened if we’d split the votes between Glasses Kevin and Contacts Kevin, as I so easily could have done. In a way it was good for Kevin that he was partnered with Susanna Reid, as it locked him in an eternal battle of ever-escalating hamminess, with each trying to outdo the other every week for audience friendly Best Of British thumbs-up camera-mugging, until it all climaxed in the Grand Finale as she spun around him by the neck and then actually died as paso flamethrowers took the eyebrows off everyone in the front row. Of course the attendant catchphrases and guffaw’ing and “From Grimsby”ness put some of you off (Kevin got more 1s than anybody else in the top 25 other than his wife) but on the other hand, at least it means he’s not got Anya’d.

14. Aljaz Skorjanec – 6.81

Most Common Score : 7
Best Finish : Abbey Clancy

Aljaz and Kevin spent the duration of the poll rolling around on top of one another, one minute Aljaz on top, the other Kevin, getting ever more sweaty and mussed-up as they…oh wait, I got lost there. I meant in terms of score. In what a source of great tension to me seeing who would end up winning but in the end…they seem to have wound up in more or less the same place, except via wildly different routes. Everyone would thought Kevin & Susanna would win and they didn’t. Nobody thought Aljaz & Abbey would win and they did. Kevin showed oodles of personality, Aljaz showed precisely none. Aljaz showed off his chiselled form in skin-tight white trousers and Borat mankinis. Kevin wore hideous 50s lounge-suits and fell over sofas. Kevin was from Grimsby, nobody ever thought it’d be a good idea for Bruce to try to pronounce where Aljaz is from oddly enough. And yet…the same place. About 6.8.

13 (14). Darren Bennett – 6.94 (6.67)

Most Common Score : 7
Best Finish : Jill Halfpenny – Winner

The quest to prove that Darren truly is the gayest straight man alive continues with the above picture. Look at Lilia’s face. Look into her brain. You can hear the “urgh, what are you doing you homo?” flash across her cortex can’t you? (For the straight part of the equation, please wait for the Lilia update in…some days).

12 (9). Katya Virshilas – 7.24 (7.32)

Most Common Score : 8
Best Finish : Gavin Henson – 5th place

What could have been.

11 (12). Brendan Cole – 7.33 (6.78)

Most Common Score : 8
Best Finish : Natasha Kaplinsky – Winner

Fewest 2s

If Aliona is the female success story of the last four years of the Pro Poll, then Brendan “Brenda” Cole is very much the male one, slowly wending his way up for a solid 6 to a mighty 7.33 via Michelle Williams (pity), Bloody Lulu (more pity), Pendledrama (even more pity) and finally Sophie Ellis-Bextor, his best chance of winning in a decade. This year I think Brendan finally found the perfect blend of personality for the show – mellowed and rendered slightly paternal by real-life fatherhood (even if Sophie was 34 BRENDAN) but still spiky and stroppy enough to denounce filthy dirty rumbas. Here’s hoping that Brendan continues on in this vein, although this year’s Launch Show did show perilous signs of him falling into the BANTER VOID left by James, relentlessly mocking the newbie pros as they twirled their new ladies around. Please don’t Brendan. It’s been a long road to here.

10 (10). Vincent Simone – 7.36 (7.29)

Most Common Score : 7
Best Finish : Rachel Stevens – Runner-Up

Least Forgotten Pro

Oh well. As that guy at the start of Jenny From The Block once said Everyone’s Got To Make A Living

9 (8). Matthew Cutler – 7.48 (7.48)

Most Common Score : 8
Best Finish : Alesha Dixon – Winner

Fewest 3s

That picture is there for those of you wondering what the artwork for Matthew Cutler as a Big Bad on Buffy The Vampire spin-off Angel would have looked like.

8 (7). Lilia Kopylova – 7.55 (7.53)

Most Common Score : 9
Best Finish : Darren Gough – Winner

Andy Murray winning Wimbledon. Daphne and Niles getting it together. Nelson Mandela being freed from Robben Island. Randy Newman winning the Best Song Oscar at the 16th try. Miss Rosa taking that prison van and mowing Vee down. A plus-sized model winning America’s Next Top Model (even if it was Whitney). Gay marriage becoming legal. Dick Dastardly finally catching that pigeon.

Some moments in history, when they come, feel like they have the tentacles of fate trailing behind them. And so it is that the age of 36, after years of speculation, rumour, and accusations that she had merely been doing the biscuit-tin rumba that Lilia Kopylova finally…is pregnant. For real this time.

Glory be.

7 (4). Artem Chigvintsev – 7.88 (8.01)

Most Common Score : 9
Best Finish : Kara Tointon – Winner

So it turns out that Artem was not wafting but drowning. What seemed to be a series of choreography consisting entirely of Natalie waving her arms about randomly whilst eye-fucking the camera, was in fact Artem slowly himself fading out of existence into a parallel universe, like an episode of The Twilight Zone (no, not the Twiglet Zone, that’s Camilla’s legs). A parrallel universe otherwise known as Dancing With The Stars, a spangly neon universe where all the dances last 40 seconds, the same pro wins every time, and they do contemporary. Spirit mediums tells me that on the other side Artem is dancing with Caroline In The City, and will probably finish about 2nd or 3rd. In return we will shortly be getting a week’s worth of Donny Osmond. Sounds about right. SORT THAT VISA OUT SOON ARTY (lol).

6 (6). Erin Boag – 7.97 (7.69)

Most Common Score : 8
Best Finish : Colin Jackson – Runner-Up

Whilst the rumours of Lilia’s impending pregnancy have swirled around for years, I don’t remember seeing anyone ponder the possibility that Erin might want to pop one out. To be fair, this is partly due to the fact that for the first seven series everyone thought she was married to Anton (well, Daily Mail journalists did) and…well nobody wants to ponder the mechanics of Anton spawning. I’m sure it involves copious spouting of the word “marrrrrrrrrvelous”. Despite this it’s apparent that Erin was pretty much flat on her back with a turkey baster in one hand as back up the second the blood was dry on Richard Arnold’s Strictly stay. So well done for giving birth to the adorable little baby Ewan. It’s…kind of hard not to view the name as a portmanteau of “Erin Wins” to be honest.

5 (19). Iveta Lukosiute – 8.12 (5.44)

Most Common Score : 9
Best Finish : Mark Benton – 7th place

Highest Climber (Places)
Highest Climber (Score)
Most 8s

So last time we were here, Iveta was known chiefly for pissing Aliona and Ola off and choreographing Ghostbusters. And being a Life Thief. Since then though, those of you who saw potential lurking within her were vindicated, as she took her comedy contestant and rode him all the way to the top half via broken English, god-awful singing, distinctively quirky choreography, that one move where she lifts her leg up in the air like she’s giving her hoo-hoo a thorough airing, and most of all lots and lots and lots of leopardprint. And now she’s been rewarded with a rugby hunk that I would imagine she’s hoping is more Austin Healey than Ben Cohen. (Personally I’m hoping for a wide streak of Gavbot as well, but that’s just me).

4 (5). Flavia Cacace – 8.13 (7.75)

Most Common Score : 9
Best Finish : Louis Smith – Winner

Highest Winner
Least Forgotten Pro

*eyes to Lilia* *eyes to Erin* *MEANINGFUL eyes to Flavia*

3 (3). Pasha Kovalev – 8.28 (8.12)

Most Common Score : 10
Best Finish : Chelsee Healey – Runner-Up

Fewest 1s

This year Pasha added depth to his life as a pro by falling in…something with his celebrity partner, Her What Flips The Numbers On Countdown, this is I think being the most extreme case of passion in real life not at all translating onto the dancefloor. People drag the old saw (that comes from that wise old sage JOEY FROM FRIENDS) about out all the time but I think actually most of the time couples who are doing the do in real life do have sexual chemistry in their dancing : Natasha & Brendan, Flavia & Matt, Flavia & Jimi, Kara & Artem. Heck their clear desire to club one another over the head and get dragged back to the cave for sex is pretty much all Joe and Kristina had going for them. Anywho Pasha has now branched out of his usual habit of doing it with make-up artists and backstage stylists and Anya Garnis and fallen for someone who is right out there in the limelight of 200,000 people a day on Countdown. I guess it’s more of an angle than his choreography this year gave him anyway…

2 (1). Natalie Lowe – 8.51 (8.37)

Most Common Score : 10
Best Finish : Ricky Whittle – Runner-Up

Highest Current Pro
Highest Female Pro
Most 9s
Fewest 4s
Fewest 3s

Who knows why Natalie’s crown slipped? Maybe taking that year off for injury impeded her progress, or maybe you all saw that It Takes Two segment where she talked about dresses for 10 minutes and it was like literally watching the sands tumble slowly through the hourglass of your life. Still, Natalie’s got a great chance to claw her way back to the top of the list with a brand new type of celeb this series. Having had two trier sportsmen and two front-runner hunks who fell to bits in the home straight, Natalie Lowe is now getting to partner her first ever full-blown COMEDY PARTNER. Truly I hope her sense of humour runs wild.

1 (2). Ian Waite – 8.55 (8.36)

Most Common Score : 10
Best Finish : Denise Lewis – Runner-Up

Highest Ex-Pro
Highest Male Pro
Least Forgotten Pro
Most 10s
Fewest 3s

Back on his throne where he belongs, baby.

We now close with the usual. Firstly a list of all the pro casts ranked by average score, to determine which was in fact the best line-up of pros the show’s ever had :

1. Series 9
2. Series 7
3. Series 10
4. Series 4/5
5. Series 6
6. Series 8
7. Series 11
8. Series 3
9. Series 2
10. Series 1

and finally the casting for MONKSEAL SECOND-CHANCE ALL-STARS, the series created out of your 7 favourite male and 7 favourite female pros, and their most-loved non-winning partner :

Artem Chigvintsev & Holly Valance
Brendan Cole & Sophie Ellis-Bextor
Darren Bennett & Letitia Dean
Erin Boag & Austin Healey
Flavia Cacace & Matt DiAngelo
Ian Waite & Zoe Ball
Iveta Lukosiute & Mark Benton
Karen Hardy & Bill Turnbull
Katya Virshilas & Gavin Henson
Lilia Kopylova & Aled Jones
Matthew Cutler & Carol Smillie
Natalie Lowe & Scott Maslen
Pasha Kovalev & Chelsee Healey
Vincent Simone & Rachel Stevens

Until next year, this was your Strictly Pro Poll 2014.


72 thoughts on “Strictly Pro Poll 2014 – The Results

    1. monkseal Post author

      I’m having majah problems with wordpress today and can’t actually see the blog, so I’ll do my best to fix…

  1. Nathan

    HDH (Her Dancing Highness) Queen of Down-Under Grand Duchess Natalie Lowe of Fierce Scarves has to defend her crown

  2. Huriye

    This was no effort at all, just alot of fun popping down memory lane, thanks! πŸ˜€
    Gave 2 x 10 to Lilia & Ian – the God & Godess from my fave series evah – series 2.
    In series 12 Pro news from Twitter: Iveta is in a plane on her way to London, and JoanneFromGrimsbyViaItaly is buliding a ginormous shoe rack in her new flat!

  3. missfrankiecat

    10 for KFG and beloved Boag. Natalie and Iveta are shaping up nicely but noone beats Whiplash Island yet. Except Kev.

  4. Lesley Rigg

    voted by instinct and in the cold hard dancing winter that is August, surprised myself, Ian, Matthew, Flavia and Iveta were my 10s, not the KFG, no idea why. May have the beginnings of dementia as I would swear that I watched from end of second series but my list of don’t knows was extensive, maybe I didn’t read blogs then and didn’t notice who the pros were!!

  5. Agrippina

    I’ve voted mainly according to how much I like the pro in question, how much their various partners have annoyed me, and, to some extent, how much I fancy them or not. Dancing/teaching skills didn’t really come into it very much. I hope this is the correct way of doing things and I haven’t messed up your poll with my irrational Karen Hardy hatred.

  6. Huriye

    Thanks for updating me on Hayley Holt! It was so obvious from the moment we first saw her dance, in a sassy routine by the new Pros that year, that actual dancing was her hobby.

    BTW glad my voting has made a difference to your Poll this year and moved poor Kylie off the bottom! πŸ˜€

  7. BuddyBontheNet

    Feel a bit sad for John Byrne. I only found out a few years ago that he was a big part of making Strictly happen. Apparently he only left because he needed to keep making a living (as one does πŸ˜€ ). Shame he didn’t have a crystal ball showing him the pros themselves could become bigger celebs than some of the celebs. No doubt the regular Strictly pros make a good living through being on the show. Them’s the risks.

    1. Left Feet

      When the Pro’s become or think they become bigger then the Celeb’s its time for them to go. They are a part of the show but not the centre. I am looking forward to the non celeb version of Strictly and seeing if it can work without the Celeb’s, in two minds if it can.

      1. BuddyBontheNet

        I don’t think any of the pros think like that tbh. My guess is that they realise how lucky they are and in fact, some have spoken about it e.g. Anton and Erin have both said they would stay until they were no longer wanted and dance with who ever they were partnered with, contender or no contender. When was the last time you heard of a Strictly pro behaving badly in their day to day lives?

        Strictly brought the dancing world into today’s media, what with all its spin offs. The celebrity world in 2004 when the show started, bears hardly any resemblance to today’s, mainly due to the plethora of reality shows. Strictly pros come under the spotlight as much as the celebs these days and they might not be bigger than the celebs, but they are definitely central to the success of the show. I’d bet some of the pros are far better known than this year’s crop of celebs.

        Not at all sure how much I will enjoy a non-celeb version. As much as I wanted to be, I wasn’t blown away by Dancing on Wheels.

      2. Left Feet

        They are all replaceable though and apart from Brendon and Anton have been. James Jordan also got much too big for his boots so I am glad his gone. I respect most of the pro’s but not one of them would have been famous without Strictly, the smart ones have made the most of it.

    2. monkseal Post author

      To be fair, given that the first series had Jason Wood in it, and Anton at the very least was already more famous than him by the end of it, I’m sure John must have been aware of the possibility at the time.

      1. MorticiaA

        Thanks, Monkseal. Didn’t mean to hassle you. Thought my browser was playing up again and only showing part of certain pages.
        I look forward to further revelations..

  8. Huriye

    Wasn’t it that John Byrne needed the time to devote to building up his Dance School? He was already well known to TV viewers who watched Ballroom Dancing, which was shown regularly during the 80s and 90s, that’s comps Amateur & Pro, not just Come Dancing, as he was a regular competitor on the scene. By 2004 when he helped set up Strictly, his dancing career was either coming to an end, or he’d retired, so wasn’t in a position, like say Vincent & Flavia, to use Strictly’s platform to create their own West End show. Though John Byrne had neither their talent nor their charisma either. He was a solid dancing professional in his day.

    BTW Monkseal, I think your computer must have different filters on it to mine with your discovery of these Strictly erotic pics!!!!

    Can I say Hanna Harrala was worth more than one series! She was lovely, and created a gorgeous Foxtrot to Mamma Cass’ “Dream a Little Dream of Me”. πŸ™‚

    1. BuddyBontheNet

      Yes, that was John Byrne. He could never have known though that the show would become one of the BBC’s most successful export products (38 countries at my last count). IIRCC it was Anton and Erin who first went on tour with a show and others led after. My impression was it was a relatively new kind of venture, but maybe I’m wrong.

      I think Hanna was one of the sexiest women ever on TV (and I’m a straight female btw!)!

      1. Left Feet

        God Series 3 was so long ago so I can’t really remember Series 3 except the last three, although I do know that both Karen Hardy and Matthew Cutler both made their Strictly debut that year and Matt got knocked out in the first round with somebody whose name escapes me.

      2. BuddyBontheNet

        Broke my heart when Matt left and would have him back over any of the current male pros, except maybe Tristan (who for me is the best thing to happen to the show in years), Anton or Brendan.

    2. Isolde

      I loved that foxtrot. When these polls crop up each year, Will Thorpe always gets an extra point on the strength of that dance.

  9. Huriye

    Matt Cutler & Partner danced a lovely Waltz for his first appearance in series 3. Craig swooned and called them “a very beautiful tall couple” and Matt blushed, as he tended to do. πŸ™‚
    So cruel to jettison a couple after one dance in week 1. So glad they don’t do that anymore.
    I remember what occurred in the earlier series more clearly than the later ones.

  10. Bashful82

    I wonder if Karen chomps down on KFG’s banana with such relish?

    Also, our Mormon is looking quite cute and wholesome and ripe for some corruption. Perhaps Artem was bumming him and Pasha to high-heaven behind the backstage?

    1. Ross

      I was thinking the same about our pet Mormon; I don’t remember him looking quite so handsome. My last memories of him in fact are of him looking mostly like a prissy Lower Sixth prefect.

      1. Huriye

        Young Jared Murillo, definitely looking more Amish than Mormon in that photo above.
        It wasn’t so much he couldn’t dance that great, but that the ITT silly questions flumaxed him so much he looked confused and wishing he’d never come over. I think too young and lacking in life experience at the time, poor luv.

      2. monkseal Post author

        My favourite Jared moment (which I may have rehashed a few times) is that It Takes Two segment where all the pros were talking about their favoured alternative careers (Erin being an estate agent <3) and Jared's choice was to be a spy. It featured him going into a London pub, sitting down next to his contact, and then saying in his best Outdoors Voice "WHERE'S THE BOMB?".

        So suave.

      3. monkseal Post author

        I always thought that Jared was at base quite handsome but struggling with an inability to master facial hair. Or any hair at all really. Even amongst this show’s male pros he stood out as having a bad hair-do (lol James, LOL PASHA).

  11. Left Feet

    Perhaps James is waiting until Ola leaves Strictly before dishing any “dirt”.
    Not sure what his future is short of being a Hopkins style rent a gob on Panel shows or the Reality show with his wife which has “Big Hit” written all over it.
    It does not look like dance shows like the ones Vincent and Flavia do are in their future.

    1. tabithakitten

      Just reassure me. You have intentionally omitted the “S” at the beginning of the second word of the reality show haven’t you?

      1. Left Feet

        Yeah you could put it that way, its not my type of show, I don’t like Big Brother and I think that it would be waste of their talent. James may be unlikeable but he is a good dancer and teacher as is Ola but they seem more interested in short term gain.

      2. BuddyBontheNet

        I suspect they will start a family soon, so they’re making the most of their earning potential. They will know that Ola could be dropped from the show (personally I hope James comes back), so they need to make hay while the sun shines!

  12. Sue Howarth

    I am suspecting Ola may become pregnant/flounce/break a toenail, possibly before Friday. Unfortunately I am guessing Steve will not be the best to cope with that. It will give us Anya back so I will be happy

    1. Huriye

      Oh dear. Steve’s been begging for votes on Twitter for this Radio Times Cover poll thingy…..that’s if he does his own Twitter. I suspect not.

  13. Huriye

    I may have to revise my opinion on JoanneFromGrimbsbyViaItaly a bit.
    Apart from the fact she’s a WORLD CHAMPION in Showdance, I sincerely believed that her sojourn in Italy would’ve broadened her horizons culturally and she’d somehow be a woman of the world totally separate to KevinFromGrimsby and his boyish non-metropolitan ways. But no. Her Twitter reveals her to be just like him.

    1. Sue Howarth

      Her task is to wrestle the “Nations Sweetheart Crown from Cheryl Summetlongandeverchanging
      I think she is well up for the task
      And yes she is very Grimsby,more Fish and Chips than Pasta

  14. Josh

    Was kinda hoping Brenda would crack the top 10 this year, given last year’s success, but everyone’s ratings seem to be higher this year. Still went up over a half a point, so keep up the good work Brenda!

    And hell yes, Iveta’s made the top 10! What a magnificent rise to glory she had last year.

  15. BuddyBontheNet

    Thought the Andrew Curden photo was from Magic Mike until I read the blurb!

    Quite surprised at some of the results this year. Glad to see some of the long goners still doing well, but shocked at how fast and far others dropped.

    Feels more like ‘Marmite time’ than ‘I don’t know who they are’.

    1. monkseal Post author

      Pro Poll 1 : 6 current, 4 former
      Pro Poll 2 : 6 current 4 former
      Pro Poll 3 : 3 current, 7 former (and of those three Natalie was injured)
      Pro Poll 4 : 3 current 7 former

  16. Left Feet

    Yes come back Artem, its never dull when dance is pushed as an art form and Artem did that, and took the piss out of the American smooth by making it a free dance along the way. Will be missed.

    1. missfrankiecat

      Not much by me! Pushing dance as an art form – lets get real ? Merce Cunningham, maybe Matthew Bourne pushed dance as an art form – Artem waved his arms like windmills and choreographed for Cbeebies, the Panto!

      1. Left Feet

        His the only pro to transfer to DWTS from Strictly so he can’t be doing too bad, maybe in 100 years everyone will be dancing like that. He always for “Me” presented dances outside of the norm. So yeah I will miss him.
        I don’t think you need to ridicule my opinion, I think I’m real, are you fake by any chance?

      2. BuddyBontheNet

        I will miss him as one of nice pieces of eye candy, but I won’t miss fuming every time he choreographs a routine than doesn’t stick to the SCD ‘rules’. His choreography will transfer seamlessly to DWTS because Bruno and Carrie Anne will love it and Len will be even more lenient towards him and his partner. I watch both shows and was thrilled to get Tristan.

    2. Huriye

      “maybe in 100 years everyone will be dancing like that.”

      It was Avant Garde 100 years ago when Isadora Duncan waved her arms about in an ethereal way. But no doubt Artem could create interesting routines, like the Showdance last year for Natalie, which was great entertainment.

  17. Bashful82

    Mr Erin looks…like he is a friend to plastic surgery gone wrong.

    If they ever do same sex couples, I so want Natalie and Iveta to team up.

    1. monkseal Post author

      I dunno, I think he just needed to moisten his top lip before the flash went off and the picture would have been improved immeasurably.


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