Strictly Come Dancing 11 – Week 7 Performance Summary

Tonight’s show was marked mostly by two absences, hovering over the whole show making it all a little gloomy. Firstly Natalie has fainted repeatedly in the dress rehearsal, meaning that she won’t be dancing the jive this evening. Secondly Natalie has fainted repeatedly in the dress rehearsal, meaning that HER HAIR won’t be dancing the jive this evening. It was teased out to its FULL POTENTIAL. She was dancing to TINA TURNER. This is a devastating blow. Get well soon, you magnificent afro.

Oh yeah, also, Bruce is off again.

In the absence of Our Beloved Ringah, it’s up to the rest of the front-runners to take advantage of the opportunity to seize the spotlight of the top of the leaderboard. They all make decent stabs at building momentum, apart possibly from Abbey. The best things I can really find to say about her Cabaret themed Charleston are that Aljaz is amazing, Aljaz’s arse is even more amazing, and Abbey makes a better job of it than Peter Shilton did in Series 8. Just about. It still scores 36 though because, you know, of the fact she’s coming off a ZOMGSHOCKBOTTOMTWO and that. Sophie’s Argentine Tango is better, whilst still fundementally just being an EPICMAZING opening pose that slowly deteriorates as the dance continues, and is at least a change of momentum after the last two weeks. What’s not a change of momentum is Brenda giving another speech, bless him. He just can’t stopped. It’s like he’s been cursed by a gypsy after-dinner speaker.

Somewhere in the middle of the pack of headline-grabbers is Ashley, who does a very energetic quickstep to Jet, which is only marred a little by another outbreak of slightly bland Olaography. Still it gets him his first non-Darcey 9s of the series, even though Ola seems to have spent most of the week trying to cop off with “The Cast Of Hollyoaks”. No, they don’t have individual names. Just one hivemind of oiled-up pecs and hair extensions. Almost certainly leading the charge for recognition though are Susanna and Kevin (who do an intensely acted and very classically glam waltz to “You Light Up My Life” which features Susanna flaring her nostrils with such ferocity I briefly worry she’s been overtaken by the ghost of Kenneth Williams) and Patrick and Anya, who do an American Smooth of almost Michael Vaughan proportions. It becomes the second 10-dance of the series, a feat that Patrick reacts to not at all. Such an inspiration to us all, showing that even still at the age of 50 with your joints creaking and your hair greying, you can STILL be a bot.

The business at the other end of the leaderboard? Very much as usual. Dave does a Scottish-themed stompy tango to The Proclaimers and launches Operation Backchat with ever great vigour. Ben continues his quest of becoming a faster dancer, if not necessarily a better one, in a jive featuring a backwards somersault off a trampolene. Fiona continues to be ever-so-slightly undermined by Anton in the Latin as he completely forgets the routine and doesn’t really bother to try to hide it. And Iveta possibly overeggs the comedy angle a little too much even for my Mark-loving tastes, as his Bond themed rumba hangs almost entirely on theming and very little on movement.

I’m not saying it’s a return to the bad old days of Ghostbusters. Except I kind of am. Will Mark survive to dance in Blackpool/Brighton/Bournemouth/Bridlington/Whatever Darcey Said just because he’s Northern? We shall see…


23 thoughts on “Strictly Come Dancing 11 – Week 7 Performance Summary

  1. Elaine

    Really missed Natalie & Artemis tonight (though was he wearing a curtain from the 70’s?)
    Thought Susanna and Kevin were rather classy though, and at least there were lots of shots of a half shirt wearing Pasha to take my mind off the dross…Dave, you have lost any Scottish pals you ever had with THAT VT. That is all…

  2. camis71

    I was confused as to why Mark was dressed as Dr Evil. Did Iveta mis-hear and think they were dancing to Goldmember instead?

    Glad you mentioned Aljaz’s arse – I couldn’t take my eyes off it. Best thing about tonight’s show. Abbey could have stripped naked and shagged Len and I probably wouldn’t have noticed.

  3. Ferny

    This is the first time I’ve not liked Mark’s dance, so naturally I voted for him to try and keep him out of the DO …lol

    I do find it somewhat amusing that Natalie leaves the opportunity open for someone to top the leaderboard an it’s Patrick that does it. I’m glad he’s got a moment in the sun though because I can’t see it lasting too long.
    Natalie better be able to bring that Proud Mary jive out for the final.

  4. Left Feet

    Yes Natalie was a big loss to the show, hopefully she will be back next week but there is a big hole this week. Good stuff from Patrick oldest man to ever get a ten surely. Dr Hammy was older among the ladies, the Donobot? Think Craig is right he is the best male dancer but he’s been in the bottom two so I really doubt he has the support.
    Why was Mark dressed as Dr Evil for a Rumba, he can dance a bit but that was awful.

  5. Monaogg

    Blofeld was definitely the wrong Bond villain for the song, but with Mark’s physique what can you do? Nice without the dodderer but otherwise the show felt a bit flat because of the missing Natalie. At least Claudia was on fine form in Claud 9 and good that Patrick got the top slot and a birthday 10 from Darcey.

  6. BookWorm

    Operation Backchat is rather irritating, isn’t it? I think Dave has a touch of the Craig Kellys about him. I almost want Alesha back just to put him in his place. Almost.

  7. Chris

    I loved this week (after a few weeks of indifference), which is quite a feat in the absence of the Proud Mary jive that I got so excited for it couldn’t possibly have measured up. Also, I think Artem’s still a little untested as to whether he can do camp choreo, and a Proud Mary jive that isn’t camp… I have no use for.
    Maybe it’s because I didn’t find out Natalie wasn’t dancing till Tess announced it (and I actually howled in despair), because by all rights this should’ve felt like that one miserable fecking week in Series 7 where everybody got injured and Ronnie Corbett was there for some reason (that’s another reason I enjoyed this week – Claudia was on fire, I want her around forever)

    But seriously, this was a week when I even enjoyed Patrick. Patrick! I don’t know if Sophie’s Argentine will hold up (it was probably that opening pose, me expecting a Matt di Angelo-sized comeback and some classic Holly Valance chairwork that blinded me) but all I know was I was going nuts after it ended. Plus, I enjoyed Fiona’s dance (I didn’t see Anton mess up, but I think my vision just doesn’t register him anymore, which was a relief during their cha cha), Dave was acceptable this week… couldn’t ask for more (OK, I want Rachel back but she’d have been stuck on Latin this week and that could’ve been horrific)

    1. monkseal Post author

      Fern’s Killer Queen was pretty camp. I mean…it was shit and dull, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t camp.

  8. Jennifer T

    Fiona also somewhat undermined by the fact that Dave Arch And His Wonderful Wonderful Orchestra simply cannot do “Song 2”.

  9. A Frog at Large

    I missed yesterday’s show due to Pestilence! the Musical being on the loop in my house at the moment, hopefully I’ll catch up this afternoon before the results show. But no Artem and Patrick as the main attraction (other than Aljaz’ ass)? I don’t know if it’s even worth watching…

    1. Huriye

      It’s certainly worth watching if you’re a fan of DANCE, as Patrick & Anya’s performance – save for a couple of tricky moments with the Lifts, but I blame Wardrobe for those – was STONKINGLY entertaining. Classic Foxtrot Smooth choreography, which Patrick danced very well, and deserved to be top of the Leader Board. I think, on the whole, the Judges got it right last night with the Final placements….well, no way should Abbey have been equal with Susanna, so that was wrong, but no doubt 3 of the Judges were watching Aljaz (no accent on me keyboard, sorry). Susanna is in pole position with the viewers to win IMO, there’s nothing the woman can’t do. DS is unreadable today, so thanks for giving me something to read. 🙂


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