Strictly Come Dancing 9 Monkies – Reader Vote Results

Whose Sex Face is the best Sex Face? *drum-roll*

As usual, where multi-votes were cast, the results are expressed in the form of the % of voters, not the % of votes. That said, let’s get giving! We open with a new category…

Best Safety Sex-Face


And she’s so pleased to receive it! That’s right, the voices inside Anita’s head finally proved useful for something, because whilst her dancing could only win her 7th place on this year’s Strictly, the bizarre faces she pulled when she was revealed to be safe propelled her into all our hearts, with an impressive 44.45% of voters rooting her rooting on.

  • 2nd – Holly Valance : 38.96%
  • 3rd – Jason Donovan : 21.96%
  • 4th – Alex Jones : 19.08%
  • 5th – Lulu : 18.56%

Best Judge


It comes to something when the speculation isn’t about who will win, but what % of the vote he’s going to crush everyone else with. This year it’s a more muted 75.27% of the vote, as both Bruno and Alesha slowly gain ground on him, and Len slowly slides further into nonsense and POINTING and shouting. Also, people ACTUALLY VOTED FOR JENNIFER GREY. PEOPLE, PLURAL. I salute you sirs.

  • 2nd – Bruno Tonioli : 11.6%
  • 3rd – Alesha Dixon : 11.16%
  • 4th – Len Goodman : 1.53%
  • 5th – Jennifer Grey : 0.44%

Best Host


Yes Zoe, it IS real. A crushing victory for the newbie presenter, who came in and made It Takes Two her own. Well the bits of it not filled with that Dancers In Disguise bollocks. Or “Points Of You” or whatever it was called. Blech. Yes, in a ringing endorsement for the presenting team, votes went in reverse proportion to the number of people who actually watched them. Marvellous. Zoe won with 58.48% of your votes.

  • 2nd – Claudia Winkleman : 35.59%
  • 3rd – Bruce Forsythe : 3.81%
  • 4th – Tess Daly : 2.12%

Best Use of Props/Staging in a Celebrity Routine

Pom pom pom pom pom pom

What a ringing endorsement for simple classic storytelling. Men rushes for plane, man finds he has lost ticket, stewardess refuses man entry unless he does quickstep with her, man and stewardess do quickstep, stewardess finds lost ticket in the middle of post-dance strip-search. Truly one of the 7 classic storylines. 58.32% of you thought similar, and praised Pasha and Chelsee’s stirling theatricality (dahling).

  • 2nd – Chelsee Healey (Jive) : 45.73%
  • 3rd – Holly Valance (Tango) : 37.51%
  • 4th – Nancy Dell’Olio (Rumba) : 37.24%
  • 5th – Jason Donovan (Tango) : 33.68%
  • 6th – Holly Valance (Argentine Tango) : 32.31%
  • 7th – Harry Judd (Tango) : 21.91%
  • 8th – Nancy Dell’Olio (Waltz) : 19.99%
  • 9th – Chelsee Healey (Samba) : 16.7%
  • 10th – Holly Valance (Charleston) : 16.16%
  • 11th – Russell Grant (Cha Cha)
  • 12th – Russell Grant (Paso Doble)
  • 13th – Holly Valance (Viennese Waltz)
  • 14th – Lulu (Foxtrot)
  • 15th – Audley Harrison (Jive)

Most BS Elimination


Such cruel folk. 51.8% of you would have put Erin’s longed for departure to Erin Island off for another week or two. Probably just the one though. It WAS Rory.

  • 2nd – Holly Valance : 50.81%
  • 3rd – Chelsee Healey : 27.36%
  • 4th – Nancy Dell’Olio : 22.8%
  • 5th – Jason Donovan : 10.1%

Best Episode


And I would imagine it would have been the same last year as well. 69.06% of you had it as one of your two favourite episodes. If you want to track the upturn in the series towards the end, then look no further than the fact that 71% of your votes went to episodes in the last 33% of the series.

  • 2nd – Two Dance Week (Week 11) : 35.63%
  • 3rd – Hallowe’en Week (Week 5) : 25%
  • 4th – Finals Week (Week 12) : 21.56%
  • 5th – Swingathon Week (Week 9) : 15%

Best Guest Performer

WOO! (And Caro)

That picture is, you understand, in no way selected to indicate why Caro Emerald was chosen as your favourite celebrity guest performer of the series. 37.15% of you had her as one of your top 2. Now name the song she did.

  • 2nd – Aloe Black : 29.71%
  • 3rd – Dolly Parton : 22.86%
  • 4th = Will Young : 16%
  • 4th = Military Wives : 16%

Best Pro/Group Dance Of The Series



  • 2nd – Team Ka$ha jive with Caro Emerald : 43.16%
  • 3rd – Vincent & Flavia’s Annual Argentine Tango Showcase : 40.26%
  • 4th – Artem is the Singular Sensation : 22.3%
  • 5th – GLADIATORS! : 21.72%
  • 6th – Addams Family Values : 18.83%
  • 7th – Aloe Blacc Needs A Dollar, so Natalie Cops A Feel : 17.96%
  • 8th – Pasha & His Flight Attendants : 17.09%
  • 9th – A Classy Tribute To Old Hollywood : 14.48%
  • 10th – Saturday Night At The Movies : 13.61%

Worst Comedy VT Of The Series


Oh Jason. There’s a thread on the Digital Spys currently asking if a celebrity over the age of 40 can ever win. In Jason’s case it probably wasn’t so much the age as…well this sort of bollocks really wasn’t it? A massive 69.86% of you chose this moment as the moment you realised that this year, the pre-dance VTs had leapt off a precipice and were never coming back. Now let’s all hope it’s impossible to run this category again next year eh?

  • 2nd – Jason & Kristina 1970s Date Night : 35.63%
  • 3rd – Jason is haunted by the ghosts of Strictly past : 27%
  • 4th – Russell’s studio is haunted : 25.33%
  • 5th – Lulu dances with Broom Brenda : 24.78%
  • 6th – 7 year old Robbie is visited by his Fairy Olamother : 21.71%
  • 7th – The Famous Five search for their Missing Dignity : 21.15%
  • 8th – For no reason here’s Lionel Blair : 20.59%
  • 9th – Robbie gets a Makeunder : 18.65%
  • 10th – Cooking With Brenda & Lulu : 18.09%
  • 11th – Jason In Drag
  • 12th – Russell & Flavia make it to that Mountain-Top
  • 13th = Jason meets Kristina at an abandoned theatre
  • 13th = Chelsee IS Eliza Doolittle
  • 15th – Alex Jones gets repeated electric shocks

King of all Pros


Can he top Artem’s CRUSHING 53.39% of all votes in his debut year? Not quite, as Pasha “only” racks up the votes of 47.67% of you to top the vote. Then again, Artem didn’t have Artem to compete against last year did he? (EXCEPT WHEN HIS BODY FAILED HIM OBVIOUSLY *woobie cry*). Another year, another newbie puts the established staff to shame.

  • 2nd – Artem Chigvintsev : 29.53%
  • 3rd – Brendan Cole : 11.63%
  • 4th – Vincent Simone : 3.72%
  • 5th – Anton du Beke : 3.26%

Queen of all Pros


Once more a much closer race amongst the female pros this year, with three of the top five having led the race at one point. And that’s just what I saw when I was checking. Still, in the end, in a series where none of the blog’s Established Female Favourites made it particular far, it feels somehow right that 21.1% of you is enough to default to Flavia.

  • 2nd – Natalie Lowe : 16.97%
  • 3rd – Katya Virshilas : 16.74%
  • 4th – Kristina Rihanoff : 15.6%
  • 5th – Aliona Vilani : 15.37%

Worst Celeb – Personality


It’s always nice when you give someone a nickname in the first week of the series that they then live up to. It was looking to be touch and go there in the aftermath of the series, as it was unclear as to who had left the worst impression. But then Bloody Lulu went around whining about how she should have got Pasha (LOL) and that appears to have sealed the deal for 57.89% of you.

  • 2nd – Dan Lobb : 35.78%
  • 3rd – Edwina Currie : 27.33%
  • 4th – Jason Donovan : 21.86%
  • 5th – Nancy Dell’Olio : 19.63%

Worst Celeb – Talent


THIS IS NO MADRID! And for 54.59% of you THIS IS NO A DANCER!

  • 2nd – Edwina Currie : 40.34%
  • 3rd – Lulu : 32.61%
  • 4th – Dan Lobb : 29.47%
  • 5th – Russell Grant : 10.87%

Best Celeb – Personality


How well she went down with the general public we’ll never know, but for the readers of this blog, there is no finer flavour of personality than laid-back Australian lazy rich bitch who didn’t give a shit, except in paso, who thought it was hilarious when she was in the bottom 2, brought a helicopter and a race-car and the owner of Formula One to training, and ultimately cracked up in tears when her time finally came following one dance which she’d spent entirely on her arse and another which caused her to cough up both lungs and a spleen. Well, 61.55% of you anyway.

  • 2nd – Chelsee Healey : 46.15%
  • 3rd – Harry Judd : 19.89%
  • 4th – Alex Jones : 19.36%
  • 5th – Nancy Dell’Olio : 14.59%

Best Celeb – Talent


In the very definition of a two-horse race, in which only 10 of the contestants got any votes, and I’m guessing one of those was a mistake, because I can’t imagine voting for Edwina on purpose even for the LOLs. Harry just squeaks out the win over Chelsee, with 89.38% of you having him as one of your top dancers. Two years in a row now, the best talent (as voted for by YOU) has won. Can this continue in Strictly 2012? FOR THE OLYMPICS!

  • 2nd – Chelsee Healey : 88.86%
  • 3rd – Holly Valance : 11.4%
  • 4th – Jason Donovan : 6.99%
  • 5th – Anita Dobson : 1.3%

Best Dance Of The Series


And the stranglehold of the top four continues, as they take up every single spot in your top twenty dances of the series (and, indeed, your top twenty-one). Whereas last year’s list found space for Gavin’s gay-making and bitter Jimi Mistry fans, this year, people have isolated their favourite dances quality-wise, and clung to them like limpits. Chelsee’s jive (with Pasha included, somewhere out of shot) was your favourite of the run, scoring positively with 45.6% of you.

  • 2nd – Chelsee Healey’s Quickstep – Sing, Sing, Sing : 38.98%
  • 3rd – Harry Judd’s Quickstep – Don’t Get Me Wrong : 38.59%
  • 4th – Holly Valance’s American Smooth – Swan Lake : 34.49%
  • 5th – Holly Valance’s Paso Doble – The Train : 28.06%
  • 6th – Harry Judd’s Argentine Tango – Ase se Baila el Tango : 20.65%
  • 7th – Harry Judd’s Viennese Waltz – This Year’s Love : 19.48%
  • 8th – Harry Judd’s American Smooth – Can’t Help Falling In Love With You : 16.95%
  • 9th – Chelsee Healey’s Rumba – Because Of You : 15.2%
  • 10th – Holly Valance’s Argentine Tango – Por Una Cabeza : 13.83%
  • 11th – Holly Valance’s Jive – Runaway Baby
  • 12th – Chelsee Healey’s Paso Doble – Malaguena
  • 13th – Chelsee Healey’s American Smooth – True Colours
  • 14th – Holly Valance’s Foxtrot – Mama Knows Best
  • 15th – Jason Donovan’s Tango – I Will Survive
  • 16th – Jason Donovan’s Quickstep – Bewitched
  • 17th – Chelsee Healey’s Charleston – 5ft 2″, Eyes Of Blue
  • 18th – Jason Donovan’s Showdance – Dancin’ Fool
  • 19th – Harry Judd’s Tango – Psycho Killer
  • 20th – Harry Judd’s Charleston – I’m Just Wild About Harry

Join us tomorrow, for my own personal selection and (no, really, it is) the final entry of this series!


23 thoughts on “Strictly Come Dancing 9 Monkies – Reader Vote Results

  1. Left Feet

    Dump the best judge category its always a one horse race (even though Craig was about as good as Bruno and Alesha this series)
    The intreasting category for me was best talent which deserved to be be as close as it was and no Russell Grant in the top five as best personality! surprised at that and the winner as well.

    1. monkseal Post author

      It’s really just there for completeness sake to be honest. I like that Alesha has gradually crawled up over the years from 4% to 8% to 11% now. Maybe by Strictly 19 she’ll be the favourite? I guess it depends how drunk she gets.

  2. camis71

    Surprised at Alex Jones 4th in personality – didn’t realise she had one! Glad Jason got no higher than 15th in best dance, and agree that most of his VTs were the worst!
    May just have to go and rewatch the Team Pa$ha / Team Bratalie pro dance (again).

    1. Carl

      Alex came across very well on Strictly (when she wasn’t screaming) but I think Monkseal’s recaps were her biggest draw.

  3. Bella

    Of course the image for best guest performer doesn’t reflect how we voted in that category.
    The second half of Team Ka$ha isn’t even IN the picture.

    I’m surprised that ‘jason does 70’s porn’ didn’t win worst VT, but maybe people tried to suppress the memory of it…

  4. Neil K

    Interesting that Pasha was such a landslide in the favourite pro poll. He barely said more than 3 words per episode either due to the language barrier or just general incomprehension of the wacky Strictly VT world he was thrown into. I’m wondering if it has anything to do with the “Monkseal Effect”. Would be interesting to know how he would do if Ian Waite were in the same series and your loyalties were divided.

    On a side note, having met Ian Waite and found out what a nice man he is, I think you should include him in the poll next year whether he’s an official dancer or not. He seems to have bucket loads more personality than most of the male pros left in the series.

    And since it’s the series end, thank you once again for all the joy you’ve brought to even the most disappointing of Strictly episodes (Wembley) via your blog. 🙂

    1. monkseal Post author

      Only 3 words is comparatively probably better than most of the chunter eminating from a lot of the male pros towards the upper end this year. Artem seemed to piss someone off every time he opened his mouth (not me though, I STILL WUBB HIM), James was particuarly…James-y after a year of playing gentleman-help to Dr Hamela, and Robin, if anything, spoke even less than Pasha did.

  5. mary

    Why did Vincent get so few votes? Not even sympathy ones because he had to dance with Edwina? Madness. Pasha is lovely too though.

  6. Carl

    Everyone seemed to love Jason’s showdance so much, I’m surprised it wasn’t higher.

    I think Robin won that sex face award – that face is a clarion call for everyone out there who makes safety sex faces.

    What was the 21st dance?

    I have to admit I thought that Caro song was catchy enough (“Ooh that man is on my list…”) although it might be down to the great intro where Katya was fanning herself and the audience cheered at the sight of her. And then Pasha flirting with Caro until he moved on to Katya. There was just such a simple joy in that dance.

    I’d completely forgotten the Lulu broom VT. And that was the week she was eliminated, wasn’t it?

    Flavia has such a strong fanbase, and she did a good job with Russell, especially once he became the “comedy” contestant and she became an afterthought. It’s a credit to Natalie and Katya they did so well with dud partners. Aliona, well, that’s probably better than she had last year.

    I wish Anita’s charleston had been in the top 20 dances but otherwise I agree with the list.

    1. monkseal Post author

      I think for a showdance to make Top 20 is doing well enough, especially danced as…oddly as it was. 21st was Jason’s Argentine Tango (*shudders*).

  7. Nikki

    Loved this! I think I’m going to miss this blog almost as much as I’ll miss the main show.

    Glad my Pash topped the best pro poll – your readers are evidently more discerning than those over at DS! Artem who?

    Happy New Year! x

  8. jean

    Glad that Chelsee won best prop and fav. dance overall, yay:)Team Kasha are a great team:).Flavia:). I expect to see more changes in the pro line-up next serie, the question is who is going to leave?I wont be sad to see Anton and Erin go.

    1. monkseal Post author

      Now that Alesha’s moving, I think we might see more stability elsewhere in the show, although I guess the new broom of a new producers might sweep clean to a certain extent.


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