First and most importantly, tonight saw the last ever (FINGERS CROSSED) edition of Len’s Glans. This takes the form of a quick blitz through of tonight’s dances (and Alex’s knickers) in slow motion, and a “Best Of” for the series so far. This features Bruno’s Wembley Meltdown, Ola kicking off and, my own personal highlight, Craig crawling up to Bruce calling him the consumate professional and improviser. Well it made me laugh anyhow. We also say goodbye to Claudia for another year by…showing a montage of Russell Grant clips. I’m sure it made sense in the production meeting.
ANYWAY! Pro-dances. It appears that, as her last act of benevolance before she sods off to The Voice, Evil Moira Ross has sat on record company bosses until they crack and let the Strictly pros play with the special guest artists. This consists of Natalie going TURBO-SLAG to Aloe Blacc as Brenda watches, terrified, from the sidelines in a stupid hat ; and Vincent & Flavia doing a very classy Christmas Dance to the Military Wives. This mostly makes me hope for a Flavia & Gareth MEGAPAIRING next year. Although let’s face it, they’d stick him with Aliona and he’d spend of his time on the show hiding in a cupboard hyperventilating. Also pro-dancey is a paso to Paint It Black with the female pros all in neon pink. Oh this show sometimes, it’s so very Strictly.
(*There was a showdance somewhere around here. It looked much the same as always. I’m skimping definitely because I’m hoping it provoked Pasha, Kristina and Aliona in the minimum to copy it. Honest*)
Results? Chelsee’s put through first, and Harry shortly afterwards. Chelsee probably wins on histrionics, but history has shwon that this is a poor predictor of who will go on to win (*cough*HAMMIE*cough*). This leaves Jason, Alex, and Holly all waiting it out to the end, where it’s Jason and Holly who get the good news, and Alex who is left to go home. She pays tribute to James’ patience and lack of patience all at the same time. Holly meanwhile cries like a sloppy dollop and Artem apologises fulsomely for all the times he was ever mean then they both collapse hugging and weeping on one another.
It’s always the ones you least expect isn’t it?