Two years ago it was now. Two years when Len said that Lisa Snowdon was the greatest female dancer to have not won Strictly Come Dancing. After laughing, crying, and picking bits of broken tv screen out of my bleeding knuckles, I did a poll on the matter, and discovered that the answer was in fact “Rachel Stevens”. And then I did the same for the boys and the answer was “Austin Healey”. Now, two and a bit series later, it’s time to ask the question again. Since then, new contenders have come and gone, reaching tantalisingly close but never quite touching those glittery balls (although not enoguh that Ray Fearon and John Barnes aren’t still contenders on the male side). Zoe Ball reminded us all how amazing she was on It Takes Two, Matt and Flavia split up because he never put the bins out, Lisa Snowdon did those BLOODY BRRREAKFAST ADS, Colin Jackson apparently made an utter show of himself on tour scoring about 19 for every dance he did ruining my memories of him forever, Kelly Brook got invited onto Starship Karen, Louisa played a goth in Casualty, Cherlie Lunghi…done a murder in a Lewis or something, Emma Bunton proved an even more inept Dancing On Ice Judge than Ruthie Henshall WHICH IS BLOODY WELL SAYING SOMETHING, and Julian Clary told us all that Gethin’s penis was the size of a tube of Pringles, which definitely has not influenced my vote in any way at all no sir.
Anyway, here they are. The ten men and ten women with the highest recorded competitive scores, and therefore the MOST ROBBED CONTESTANTS IN STRICTLY HISTORY. But who is the best never to have won?