So, two results shows in and Len’s Glans is still here. Predictably enough it’s already devolved from what is notionally an excuse to seriously critically analyse the minutiae of a dance right down to basically playground bullying where the judges slow everything down just to poke fun at the ridiculous faces everyone is pulling. As writer of this blog, I feel I am in the BEST POSSIBLE POSITION to criticise this.
The opening pro-dance this week is to a medley of the songs of West Side Story. I think. The only word the band sings throughout is “MAMBO!” (probably for the best given last night), so it’s hard to be sure of these things. Also performing on the pro side are Vincent & Flavia, doing a rumba to Susan Boyle shrilling thinly through “Unchained Melody”. Even though she’s pointlessly brought a whole chamber orchestra (or two) with her, they WILL NOT BE STOPPED. That’s the spirit! Take THAT, Syco!
But that’s not all! There’s even MORE dancing to come as visiting from America are Julianne Hough and the cast of Footloose. They reel their way through a truly dismal sludging up of “Holding Out For A Hero” for what seems like an age before KENNY MOTHEREFFING LOGGINS kicks in and things get good. Just like things always do when Kenny’s around. Things get so amazing that my favourite lady-contestant from So You Think You Can Dance – Fierce Rithy Pereira randomly turns up and starts doing a jig. I hope Matt Flint Mania had something to do with this, because then my newfound love for him can continue.
Erm, anyway, enough of other shows that nobody watched, what’s happening on this one? Well, Nancy is on the bottom 2, which is bad for my heart, because it means our time together is almost over, but joining her nobly as some sort of human shield is Dan Lobb. Who then goes home. And seems simultaneously grumpy about it, but also wanting everyone to know that he’s not really bothered or anything, because he’s so above all this. Which…would make a pattern.
Oh yeah, and Claudia wears the worst outfit ever. I guess she has to make this interesting for herself somehow.