The Apprentice 7 – Week 4 Summary

Ha! Yes! I know what we’ll do! We’ll have a SKINCARE task! That way, even if the men do mess up, we can all pat their hair and tell them we never expected to be competent anyway! YES! THAT’S THE PLAN!

But first, there needs to have a team-switch up, because whatever Lordalan did last week appears to have submerged Edna’s personality, and she’s one of about four people this series who have one, so something needs to be done to get it back. Zoe is sent over to Venture to be PM, and Felicity walks in the other direction, tugging Jim behind her, probably to help Venture’s win-loss record. Because if there’s anyone that can snap you out of an 0-3 funk it’s Jedi Jim right? WRONG. THE CURSE OF KAEN IS NOW THE CURSE OF LOGIC! LEARN TO FEAR IT. Anyway, hopefully this works, and Edna does something stupid again.

The task is to go sell beauty treatments and beauty products in… Birmingham, for some reason. Probably to bait people into making ugly regionalist comments. Well done Natasha (*horrendous, HORRENDOUS fake Brummie accent*) and Susan (“EVERYONE HERE IS POOR!”). Before teams leave though there’s the usual round of pitches by eager inventors to the teams, the notable features of which are Leon having something that, if it isn’t exactly Gay Panic, is at least in the same neighbourhood over putting a bit of mascara on, and Susan sticking her neck out to try to lure people in with her skincare expertise, which works for her in the short term (her team get the designated TASK-WINNING PRODUCT pretty much solely on the basis of her RAY-SOO-MAY and enthusiasm), but not so much in the long-term (Zoe, Helen and Edna all spend the rest of the task hacking at it).

In the end, Venture end up selling spray-tans and pedicures, and Logic end up shoving Ellie, Melody, Jim and Tom in a room in the corner of the Bullring, locking the door, and spending the rest of the day selling bits of hair for 5p a go, at the behest of Project Manager Felicity, who has suddenly found herself bereft of PMs to suck up to, and so has decided to spread the love around as thinly as possible, and somehow ends up with nothing left for Tom who she badgers horribly all day. Anyway, at some point during the day Tom escapes from the cage and sent to get help, but soon forgets why he even left, and he too gets sucked into selling bits of hair for 5p a pop. This leaves Ellie, Melody and Jim trapped in their box until some lonely pigeons flutter through the bars, and they give them a massage and a blow-dry.

Oddly enough this business plan does not result in success, in fact it results in a BLAHDDY LOSS, so Zoe, despite having done little more than force all the decisions on Susan and gargle like a stuck drain, is now a winning PM. Somehow this feels even worse than when Edna won hers. The winning Venturians are sent off to do dancing with Katya Virshilas (HOORAY!) and Robin Windsor (eh, ok), and nothing interesting happens, except Susan realises that other people don’t like her quite as much as she likes herself. Well, it was about time really.

Back on Logic, Vinnie Disney has decided that SOMETHING MUST BE DONE TO STOP THE CURSE. He hasn’t decided what, but I bet whatever it is will get him fired fairly soon. Felicity on the other hand has even less of a plan than she’s had all day, and brings back Ellie (for being grumpy – no, really, that’s about it) and Natasha for not selling enough (despite being one of the three people INCLUDING HERSELF that Felicity allowed to sell anything ever), and enraged by her utterly absent…well…logic, Ellie and Natasha go at her like the velociraptors in Jurassic Park until there’s nothing but a carcass left. Which then gets fired.

Sadly none of this pokes a personality out of Edna again. Ah well, there’s always next week. It’s the advertising task! That’ll do it, right?


21 thoughts on “The Apprentice 7 – Week 4 Summary

  1. Ferny

    I had competely forgotten about Edna before I read this summary – where was she?! I was mostly focussing on Tom’s dorkiness tho, bless.

    I really cannot see any other winner here about from Jim, but I can’t imagine they can be that obvious can they? Also, I’m still not sure on one point – this business that Alan is buying into…does he come up with the idea for it?

    1. durnovarian

      I agree about Jim, but did I dream it or did Kaen seem to be developing a bit of a tendre for Glenn?

    2. monkseal Post author

      All I remember Edna doing (apart from being a surprisingly not horrific saleswoman) was dob Susan in to Zoe and Helen for not doing any work miss.

      Nick pointing out that Jim “saving the team” was him pulling in £15 worth of sales makes me feel a bit worse for his chances after this task. Or at least the editing team leaving that exchange in when it could easily have been cut out. It reminds me a bit of when Liz Locke lied about having put herself forward to be PM. If he’s not careful (/doesn’t get himself off Logic) he might end up with a win/loss/boardroom record that resembles hers as well.

    1. monkseal Post author

      It’s alright! He’s got a plan! Apparently if you take in more money than you spend, it’s a profit. Venture did that this week, so they won! It’s SIMPLE!

    1. monkseal Post author

      Well I wasn’t going to share him out.

      (Unless it’s the cigarette smoking taxidermy cat. Then I might work on something.)

  2. Neio

    I like Ellie, but I didn’t really like her and Natasha just coldly stalking past Felicity without saying goodbye or shaking hands or anything. I can understand them being miffed about being taken into the BR, but it’s not like she was Melissa or something. Felicity seemed like a nice girl, just totally unsuited for this.

    Leon’s almost-Gay Panic over spray tanning a guy was hilarious. Jim seemed far more comfortable with getting in touch with his more homoerotic side, which I have no complaints about.

    1. monkseal Post author

      Notice also how despite being very keen to get his hands on some semi-naked young men, nobody came out of the episode thinking that Jim was actually gay, Leon.

  3. Dee

    I know Jim’s the chosen one this series but darn if I didn’t enjoy seeing his gormless expression after Nick shut him down in the boardroom over the £7 massages. He’s certainly no Margaret but that was one of the few times I’ve liked Nick in recent years.

  4. FuTeffla

    Watching Tom practice massaging on Jim leads me to suspect that Lord Sugar is now writing slash fanfiction for my benefit. Keep it up, Sugar. Next week, I want a scene where Jim tells Tom he looks beautiful without his glasses.

    1. durnovarian

      Please don’t suggest that Edna and her leather glovs feature in this.

      Brain bleach, quick! 🙂

  5. Rah

    I was delighted to see that my desire for an Apprentice-Strictly fusion programme was recognised in this episode, and with Kirsty flashing “You’re Fired” on her chest on SYTYCD last week, it was a nice balance.

    Thanks for the recap as always, you are acer than ever. Sorry to be sycophantic – I hope you don’t get tired of hearing compliments.

  6. Wiskas

    I miss Margaret. I would dearly like to see her sorting out Whiny Susan and Lucky Jim – let’s face it, someone has to.

    1. monkseal Post author

      Hopefully she’ll be back for Interviews again. Last year was very special in that respect.


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